Count Your Breaths
by Rin-neechan
Summary: Keeping track of your age when you've spent several years unconscious is as difficult as counting your breaths while you sleep.


I have no idea where this idea came from. But it took me all of forty-five minutes to write, so, yeah, here ya go.

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_"So Vegeta, how old are you?" Mrs. Briefs said flirtatiously as she poured him a large glass of iced tea._

_Everybody around raised an eyebrow when they heard no response from Vegeta._

_The other eyebrow was raised when they saw the look on his face._

_He was thinking about it._

_"I don't know."_

_"What do you mean, you don't know? Were your Saiyan monkey parents too busy teaching you how to kill, they didn't teach you how to count?" Bulma barked back._

_"I KNOW HOW TO COUNT, YOU FOOL!" How dare somebody accuse him of being stupid. It wasn't as simple as they thought. He really didn't know._

_"Well, then how old are you?" Bulma asked, but this time, blatantly mocking him. _

_"Don't make me repeating myself, Woman."_

_"Fine, why don't you know?!"_

_"I don't need to explain myself to you."_

_"Well, lets figure it out, shall we? How old were you when Planet Vegeta was destroyed?"_

_"I was five years old."_

_"Well, Goku was born that year, and he's twenty-six right now, so you must be thirty-one then."_

_Vegeta downed his iced tea and walked away. _

_-------------------------------------------------_

Vegeta wasn't stupid.

He really didn't know how old he was.

Earthlings and Saiyans did measure time and ages with the same degrees, but it was more complicated than that.

Vegeta had spent several years of his life sleeping.

And didn't even know what age it was right now.

The year it took him to get to Earth after learning about the Dragon Balls from Raditz was only one of the many times it took that long to reach his next destination.

How can you be expected to keep count of your years in such situations?

Vegeta always checked the date on his space craft when he woke up, to see if the anniversary of his birth date had pasted while he was asleep.

Sometimes it would, sometimes it wouldn't, sometimes it would more than once.

Earthlings seemed much more keen of their age.

But Saiyans aged much slower than humans.

Even when Saiyans are in their fifties and sixties, they still look fairly young.

They retain their youthfullness so they can fight longer.

That was the only reason they lived.

Fight.

Kill.

Conquer.

Age didn't really matter.

Saiyans were considered old when they weren't able to fight any longer.

At which point, they would either kill themselves, or have somebody else kill them.

If they couldn't fight, they were useless.

As far as Vegeta knew, he could still fight, and was still in good health.

So he was still young by Saiyan standards.

But for Earthlings, any child from the age of two through twenty-eight seemed proud as they aged.

Once they reached twenty-eight is when they'd start feeling old, and would lie about their age.

Why did they care so much about a number?

One year closer to death, perhaps?

Vegeta never bothered studying the customs of the planets he "visited", but it occured to him that he'd be here for a while.

He didn't feel like drawing unwanted attention to himself.

So in this case, he bothered.

He wouldn't lose sleep over the stupid encounter.

He knew that there was more to the fact that he lost count of how old he was.

There was a reason.

Earthlings are just simple, small-minded creatures, who didn't have enough interaction with other life forms.

The Namek didn't count.

Neither did Kakarot.

Kakarot passed as a human all these years, so could barely call himself a Saiyan.

Vegeta didn't see how the Namek passed as human, but somehow they believed it, but again, nurture over nature.

Vegeta and the Nameks that they used the Dragon Balls to wish to another planet were the first real "extraterrestrial" interaction earth had ever seen.

He was sure that this particular question wouldn't show up again.

Nor would anybody care to throw him any "birthday parties".

His birth wasn't something any earthling would celebrate.

His birthdate would be "celebrated" with a mental note to himself that he was now thirty-two.

As Vegeta began to make his way to the bathroom, he heard them all still talking.

"Dad, come on! Vegeta didn't even know how old he is!"

"Well Bulma dear, it seems more complicated than you think."

"Oh right, Saiyans don't bother with learning how to count, just how to kill, right dad?"

"Now Bulma, think about it logically.Vegeta's done quite a bit of travelling in his days. Just his voyage to earth from where ever he was took him a whole year to complete. And I bet you anything that wasn't the only occasion where it's taken that long. For Vegeta, keeping track of his age is like keeping track of how many times you inhale while you're sleeping. I didn't think mocking him like that was smart, Bulma. As a scientist, it's best we research before we draw assumptions, or we'll have to enjoy the taste of our feet then won't we dear?"

Vegeta laughed to himself.

There's one human he felt he'd get along with just fine.

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Well that's it. Be awesome and review.

Rin-neechan


End file.
